Takeaways

U have so many experiences in life that leave u feelin like, "WTF?!" or "Wow, that was a colossal waste of time."

Some people live by the philosophy that everything happens for a reason. I.....don't know, sumtimes there mite not be a "takeaway"; maybe you just plain went thru sum BS.

But for the past month I've been working at a credit union (it's like a bank, if you don't know), and here's what I'm taking away:

* Not quite a mastery, but increased competency, in the (whack) art of small talk.

* Recovery practice.(People really do expect you to know everything, and to do everything w/lightning speed. If you don't know how to do something or it takes longer than it should, you have to put people at ease and skillfully save face.)

* A confirmed desire to be an entrepreneur. I see the business owners come in every day with their checks and cash deposits, and I just imagine what a freeing experience it must be to generate your own stream of revenue, to set your own prices, to have something to fall back on, to plain be your own BOSS! I don't care if you have a dog-washing business; that belongs to YOU!

And while I'm speaking of the credit union, what's amazing is that this is the FIRST and ONLY job I've had where I genuinely liked ALL of my coworkers. Managers, everybody. I'm not used to getting to be myself at work, if you know what I mean. I even walked in with baby blue fingernails and yellow hair yesterday, and the manager said, "You just like me, don't know what u wanna do with ur hair." Much better than what I thought she would do...

Dear Maxwell,

Thank you Sir, for showing these artists how a comeback should look.
Moving major units, going #1, winning Grammys, going on tour, and still singing w/substance. You've given hope to many artists with latent careers.

Unlike Usher, who wants you to put hands in folks' pants. Unlike Teena Marie, who still won't let Rick James die. Unlike DMX, who won't stay out of jail long enough to drop an album. Eminem did OK, but we ain't really checking for him like we were checking for you. Charlie Wilson...I guess he did OK, but anytime your grandpa still rocks cornrows and sings love songs written by R. Kelly, there's a bit of an identity crisis to conquer. Jaheim? He's clearly for the over-30 set, now, and Toni Braxton? *bowing my head in shame* look at her old, stank azz in a sheer cat suit w/half her head shaved off on theybf.com, and you will be speechless as well as saddened.

Who's left? Aah, I know who Black America (and others) are really waiting on and praying for. I mean, if these people were to come back, ppl might just camp out at the record store like white ppl waiting on iPads and iPhones.

And while I hate to be the bearer of bad news (aka The Truth), let me just announce, for the record, that LAURYN HILL AND DE'ANGELO are too far gone. They will never make records again. Face the facts, my friends. Some people just have that one-and-done thing going on - they drop a masterpiece and that's all they got to give. I know Ms. Hill is so talented it's ridiculous, and she has more stories to tell and more songs to sing. But her mind is gone and her heart's not in it, and so NO, she will never be coming back. Pour sum out of whatever you're sipping right now.

No Homo

(No offense, either)

But have I mentioned how much I looove damn Taraji P. Henson?

Work today was crazyyyyy, but I was online and saw that she was this month's "Essence" cover girl. Made me happy, cuz month before last was Zoe Saldana, and I HATE her. (Yes, I do - I don't care what you say!)

When I got home -Raji P. was waiting for me in the mail!!! I smiled cuz she was smiling (and also cuz I just bought like $30 worth of nail polish, which has become an obsession for me of late) and I almost forgot how sucky work was today.

I keep trying to tell myself I'm not racist. But u gotta understand the sense of pride I get when I see beautiful, radiant, flawless brown women like her and Miss Tasha Smith (and Nia Long and Angela Bassett)! They just make me happy.

This is Y You Should Treat Ppl RIGHT!

I've blogged before about the group Brutha and how talented I think they are. However, their first CD crashed and burned, and I'd been hoping in my heart that they would make a victorious re-emergence.

So too funny, I go to FYE at Oakland Mall yesterday, and I see these gentlemen have a mixtape (along w/a completely new image). However, this mixtape was literally being given away with the purchase of an Usher or Monica CD. Said mixtape didn't even have a bar code, so you couldn't purchase it if you wanted to.

We browse the store a bit and my dude buys this old Kanye CD. He's thinkin' it's a long shot, but he picks up the Brutha mixtape and asks if he can get it with his purchase.

We weren't even expecting what happened next - The cashier went off! Here's a summary of what he said:

"Take it; I don't care. Those guys aren't nice people at all. They came out here and did an appearance. They didn't speak to anybody and then they just left. They just weren't nice guys. If you wanna pick that (CD) up, then go head, you can have it."

So I asked if I could have one too. (Sh*t, since we givin stuff away) Homeboy (who had on a turquoise hippie headband, btw) said, "Yea, I don't care. Take it."

I would never have guessed these soft, a capella gospel-singin' brothers would be a**holes (even though we knew they had extreme issues, thanx to that BET dramedy). But this, ladies and gentlemen, is why you need to treat ppl right. You just never know... Maybe they were mad at having to be in sum random metropolitan Detroit-area mall. (which is understandable, coming from sum1 who works at said mall.) But damn, you could feel the resentment in the cashier's heart as he spoke of their visit.


(SIDEBAR: you can listen to this mixtape online for free, and well, I LIKE it! Even though, they are clearly following in the sex-thug footsteps of Yung King Tremaine Songz...)

Don't B Too Easy to Please

I rarely, barely, hardly, marginally watch "American Idol."

But when I do catch it, I usually just check for Big Mike and Crystal Bowersox. (sp?) You know Deva has things I dislike about each of them, but I absolutely think they're the most talented and appealing contestants this year. ANYWAYS, the point is yesterday I saw Mike saying he made a goal for himself the year before this to be in the top 3, and he was proud of himself for meeting his "high" goal.

The funny thing is, Ellen was genuinely disappointed that his goal was so low. "Your goal should be to win, not to be in the top three," she said.

"Well, yea, that's the next goal" - he tried to clean it up. Ells shut that down again, like I don't get why anyone's goal wouldn't be to win.

And well, maybe this is ironic, but today he was voted off the show. He set his goal to be in the top 3, he got there...and now he's gone. It shocked me, because I'd have loved to see him win, but it's certainly a reminder that you can go as far as you dream you can - so don't sell yourself short.

A Sunny Day at the South Pole

Must be something strange going on today, cuz my Dad said he likes my hair!

You know what it looks like? A Rihanna 'do with the shaved sides and curls at the top! I could NOT believe it when he complimented me on it, cuz my Dad does not talk to me. I'm not kidding.

I Am So Fake

I hated this Alicia Keys "Unthinkable" song - even though I really liked the beat and the vibe of it.

I kept turning it off all mad, like, "I don't wanna hear her singin to somebody's husband."

But then I learned that Drake wrote the song. And now I sing it all day long.

If Worst Comes to Worst...

Got a good idea today.

If I ever become a stripper, I'll call myself "Charity."

That way when your wife or baby mama asks you where all your money went, you can say, "I gave it all to Charity."

Aha!

I've mentioned before that I've always had such a hard time finding products to help clear my skin. However, it's been about a week and a half now and I've been using this new St Ives Green Teas Scrub.



I don't wanna call it too soon, but.....I Luvs it! It reduces redness, my lil pimples shrink rite on up, I don't see and of the oiliness I usually have, and it hasn't even been two weeks yet!

I remember a couple of years ago I was in this summer program, and there was a community bathroom. :( How bout like all 30 of the girls in the program used the St Ives Apricot Scrub? I had fallen out of love with that face wash a while ago, but St Ives is a respectable brand and green tea is trendy right now, so I decided to try this new stuff. So far so good, and I will be buying the green tea cleanser as well.

Elegant and Unexpected

You hear a lot about what I don't like, but here's something I just fell in love with like two seconds ago.



I'm working one of those jobs now where you have to be conservative, but I saw this pretty blue shade of nail polish called "Ocean Love Potion." It's by Sephora by OPI. The problem with polish is that it doesn't matter if you spend $2 or $12; it's gonna chip the next day. Period. But this shade looks great on my hands (I guess blue and brown do go together, lol) - I don't mind reapplying every day, if need be.

Just hope they don't make me take it off...

Wish I Felt the Same

This lady stopped by my job today at about 2:30 p.m. She said she was on her way to her other job and wouldn't be done til about 2 a.m.

I'm like, whew, that's tough. She said, "Everything I do, I love. It's not a job, it's a joy."

Made me smile. One day, I'll be able to say that, too!!!

10 years ago, he was The Man.

Sigh. Oh Luda, what's happened? Last month you were an opening act for the Black Eyed Peas. Next month, you'll be performing at a casino here in Detroit....not a stadium or a concert venue, but the Motor City Casino.

Hmmm...Does this mean you officially fell off???

I Most Certainly WILL Be Watching This

For obvious, unnamed reasons.

VH1 TV Shows | Music Videos | Celebrity Photos | News & Gossip

Yea, I Fell For It

In my 23 years, I've yet to find a face wash/skin care routine that really impressed me. For a while I'd been using some daily face wash that contained witch hazel by Olay, along with the classic St. Ives Apricot Scrub. I noticed less acne breakouts, but I was still seeking something to rid these dark marks.

My grandmother said she uses "The Wave," which is the battery-powered scrubber pad system by Neutrogena. Thought about that, but then I saw the L'oreal Go Clean 360 commercial with the lovely Freida Pinto talking about the "scrublet" they have and how it deep cleans down to your pores and whatnot. So...I decided it was worth a shot.



Well, it wasn't. My skin was completely dry afterward. Like, dry as in ashy and peeling. And now I have a complete breakout going on like I cannot believe!

I'm trying to determine if I've done anything lately to aggravate my skin, but I can't think of anything. So in short, leave this Go 360 face wash crap on the shelf. They have other brands under the 360 name that look less like a gel than the one in the green bottle, (the one I used)and more like a cream. The cream ones may be more moisturizing, but I'm not sure I'm willing to try them.

Whataya Want From Me?

I have to say this: I think every lady can name one man they wish weren't gay. For me, this man just might be Adam Lambert.

It's a little freaky, I know.

This is the exact moment I became a fan. Him performing a Smokey Robinson song. And killin it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9c4s2JfBj-M&feature=related

And here's the song I cannot stop singing.

Mr. Usher

You of the current mid-life crisis. I want to buy your album, but I bought the last one and it sucked. Millions of us adore the masterpiece that was "Confessions," but now that you're out here telling girls to put hands in each other's pants, I won't hold my breath for content as pure and perfect as before.

Do I like your singles on the radio? Yes, they all grew on me. However, Mr. Usher, you have so many DAMN singles that I am not so sure I need to go spend money on your album anymore!



Thanks for single-handedly saturating the market. However, I do enjoy that you have a song where you use the term "shones," and I do love the (almost sacrilegious) Stevie Wonder sample on that Lil Freak song. And I def enjoy THIS song:

I Just Wanna Know

Alfre Woodard - why you name your daughter Mavis?



and why does it always look like Trina's eyes aren't open all the way? like a bullfrog or toad.


And to all white girls - why do you try on swim suits in the store wit no underwear? Don't you know all the nasty girls who tried that thing on before you did the same thing? One girl actually took that hygiene shield out and stuck it to the floor. I'm supposed to clear the rooms after each customer, but I bet you I left that right there on the floor.

Step Up Yo Vocab!

I'd like to compile a list of phrases that I no longer want to hear in popular music under any circumstances. There are more rhyming phrases available to you, courtesy of the expanses of the human language.

Your love is sent from above

Butter pecan Puerto Rican (that sh*t drives me crazy)

What would I do without you

You're the one for me/you're the only one I see/everything I need (or) all I'll ever need

You hypnotize/ me with your eyes

I'll give you everything/give you all of me

- and how many times is Drake gon talk about a damn "Celebration"?

....and I'm sure there are many, many more because rappers recycle lines ALL the time. Feel free to tell me what I missed.

I Know I'm Probably Late

But my friend Shay Shay just told me about this yesterday. I'm a Pitbull fan, so when she told me he punched some guy out at a concert for throwing money in his face, I had to look it up. This mess IS funny. Pitbull knocks this man smooth out, then keeps rapping. Scroll to about halfway in...

L.B. : You Back, Baby??

You can ask my brother, Sir March the V. I used to ride for Lloyd Banks in high school. Yes, like 6 years ago. So if he's finally back, I'm inclined to see what he's talkin about.

I hate Juelz Santana and all things Dipset-related, but I do like this new Lloyd Banks single featuring Juelz, "Beamer, Benz or Bentley."



I tend to dislike men in white outfits. But Mr. Banks in this hookup with the white hat and puff vest? That is all right. The sweater with the polka dot blouse underneath, though? Naw, can't get with that.

Dear Monica aka Miss Thang

Mmmmmmmmmmmmm, Monica. Why, oh why? Why did you get my hopes up? Why did you show me your struggle to make this album and your vision to give us fans the music we deserve?

Cause, Momma, I'm not sure that you did that. First of all, you gave me 10 songs. I coulda gotten more content if you dropped a dang mixtape. I love your vocal tone and the lyrics, but I'm 60 percent done listening to the album, and this simply was not a memorable experience. I can't think of many songs that I'd like to repeat, aside from "Everything to Me," which I can hear on the radio right now, and "Believing In Me."

And where the hell is that "Infinity" song? That's what you call a BANGER! And who approved these Missy songs??? You coulda saved them trash tracks. They sound like uninspired samples she meant to put on a Keyshia Cole album four years ago. Missy, you wrong for doin Monica like that. I really believe you were trying to clear some space on your laptop and said, "Wait, what's this song? I don't even remember makin this...Keyshia pregnant, so she ain't droppin no album soon...who can I dump these tracks on?"

I mean, Miss Thang, you're my gyrl, and I will definitely give this album a chance to grow on me. It's not bad...it just didn't hit me over the head like I expected it to. I thought I was gon throw this CD in, turn it up and ride OUT!!! Did Rocko f* up ur vibe or sumthin, Momma?

Women In Leadership

Hey Friends of Deva!

I just want to share this with you all. This topic is nothing new, but in recent work experiences, a friend and I were really confused as to why we got along so well with each other - but our supervisors only seemed to get along with the men in the office.

I know that I find it easier sometimes to talk to males. Many of y'all are nonchalant, find humor in a lot of situations, don't deal in drama and are therefore easy to get along with. So to an extent, I can understand. But I think, ladies, if we gave each other a chance, we'd find many likable qualities in each other.

I attended a Women In Leadership Conference last month, and on the panel was an entrepreneur named Christina Lovio-George, who owns a PR firm in Michigan. The moderator asked the panelists to leave the audience with a final thought, and Ms. Lovio-George's words really stood out to me. I can't quote her verbatim, but basically, she mentioned all the hats that women have to wear - we go to work and try to prove ourselves and show that we're as good as any man, then we go home and we have husbands, kids, church, and all kinds of responsibilities and demands pulling on us. As women we should understand how much the next woman has to bear. But for some reason, when it comes to business, women are much harder on each other than we are on men. Ms. Lovio-George pretty much said this saddens her, and she'd like to see us get to a point where we're a little more kind to each other and forgiving in the workplace.

The way she said it was way more poignant - but I had to share it because it really deserves our consideration.

WAIT - I found a video from the conference! I didn't watch it, let me be real, but her (the lady with the big hair) closing remarks would be near the end, fittingly.

I'm Straight...on Facebook

Do ppl really think they foolin us, using FB to publish pics/statuses/wall posts to combat public perception?

We KNOW you gay.

I'm not saying any names. I'm NOT. Don't get mad! I'm not mad at you. I understand ppl don't always make it easy on each other to be who we really are.

But why you tryna use facebook to put up a facade? The beauty (to some) of the Internet is that you can be whoever you want to be online...but we see you in real life, dawg.

And we don't believe you! We. Ain't Buyin. It!

"Real Detroit Weekly"

Because I like to learn about what's new in my city, I always pick up the free publications located at various places around town. Examples include "Real Detroit Weekly" and "BLAC Detroit" magazine.

The RDW issue of March 3-9 had the Black Eyed Peas on the cover, so I picked it up to read the interview and came across this editorial on a page called, "Vengeance & Fashion" by The Lowdown Carroll. I'm not sure if that attribution is correct, but that's beside the point. In a previous blog, I wrote about Detroit Mayor Dave Bing's proposal to save money by essentially shrinking the city, or moving residents out of the less populated areas to more concentrated areas, thereby saving the need for excess resources. The writer of the editorial in RDW agreed with the plan, and while I'm all for the creative application of metaphors and analogies, this one went a little too far.

Here it is, word for word:

"DAVE BING TO PULL RABBIT OUT OF HAT

Dave Bing has come up with a plan that I fully endorse. Take the last couple people hellbent on living in the city of Detroit and move them all to the same city block or something. You'd need one police office, one garbage man...it's absolutely brilliant.

So with this fantastic plan, of course, come all 12 people in Detroit whining about how they want to stay on their block, and how great that block was once upon a time...like some fu*king fairy tale. Then they will whine about how some drug dealer came and shot their grandson (who was a straight-A student, and so loving, and never had any problems with anyone...give me a fu*king break) in broad daylight!

Look, drastic times call for drastic measures. If you have to start treating the die-hard Detroiters like we did the Native Americans, then I say go ahead and break out the small-pox blankets and the muskets or whatever we used. Or at least put this whole reservation plan into place..."

Wow. That was all I could say in response to this ignorant diatribe. I know he'd probably like to say I'm being hypersensitive, but considering Detroit is mostly populated by a certain minority, and considering the use of "we" by the author, it's hard not to perceive a racial subtext. And since we all know the ill fate of the Native Americans, I shudder at the mere suggestion that Detroiters be subjected to such treatment. Let's say the city in question was a suburb like, oh, Royal Oak or Bloomfield Hills. I doubt the author would even hint at the use of "small-pox blankets" and "muskets," or any such method that was used for genocide.

And Detroiters, if you're leaving the city to go be neighbors with people like the author of this editorial, then...good luck to you.

You're So Quiet

People say this to me a lot. And actually, people, I'm not that quiet. There's really a LOT going on - inside my mind.

I'm just practicing that old saying, "If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all."