GAP Inc.

Let me tell you how GAP hosed my life. IDK if I'm the only person in America, but I'm so done with skinny jeans, mainly because I can't wear them to work and also because EVERY store ONLY sells skinnys, so I'm rebelling at my lack of options.

So imagine how pleased I was to see a sale sign right underneath a stack of "sexy bootcut" jeans at GAP. I grabbed every wash and tried them on. Like I was expecting, they fit like they were made for me. (I worked there a couple years ago; they never let me down.)

But when I got up to the counter, they rang up for twice as much. I asked the cashier what the deal was, and he says, "OH, only the light wash is on sale."

In the words of Dave Chapelle, "GOTCHA B*TCH!"