Transitioning

I thought I had decided that I got my last perm in 2010. However a brief convo with my boss's boss's boss (as in the top boss) lead me to this question:

Well, let me give u the replay then ask the question.
HER: "Oh, your hair was long last week. Now it's short."
ME: It's different every week.
HER: We had a picture in the paper of you over the weekend with the longer hair, which is not to say you don't look nice with shorter hair too, and I thought it was a great picture that they took.

So the question here is, when going natural, am I altering the texture by continuing to press it, or is it better to just let it grow like it wants to and leave it alone?

Madea's Big Happy Family

I don't want to engage in the now-popular debate about how Tyler Perry is destroying Hollywood and the Black community. I may have lost friends going down that road, lol. All I intend to say with this post is that I watched TP's newest play, "Madea's Big Happy Family," over the weekend and was reminded why I'm a fan.

I've been stalking Redboxes all around this city since before Thanksgiving attempting to rent the play. It was worth it.  "Madea's Big Happy Family" was consistently laugh-out-loud funny; TP said some things men need to hear, some things women need to hear, some things single people need to hear, and some things not single people need to hear; and as always, I love when he speaks to the audience after the show because he shares some insight that blesses my soul, seriously.

Tyler has a message to share and was extended a platform to share it with more and more people, so I don't fault him for taking the chance to make movies and TV shows, which I will flatly say, seem to be outside of his lane. I watch them simply because several years ago, I saw some plays featuring a character who reminded me of people I knew, thereby becoming relatable and hilarious.
And it was clear to me after watching "Madea's Big Happy Family" that plays are what he does best - just connecting with his audience on his terms, through humor, song and real talk.

IT'S ON!!!

Making a new year’s resolution always seemed like a vain exercise for a person like me. Being a constant goal-setter was countered by chronic procrastination, yet for some reason I began 2010 making a list of resolutions sparked entirely by a photo shoot I envied in a magazine.


Serena Williams, with her abs of steel and zero percent body fat, inspired me to scribble “getting fit” on a piece of paper. Writing it down was the easy part, and before I knew it I’d filled the paper with resolutions. If I could find that list now, maybe I could tell you how many of those I actually accomplished.

But this year, as I approach 25 years old, losing weight is again my top goal, and to accomplish that I plan to do something crazy – literally. If you’ve caught the infomercials, you know “INSANITY” is billed as the hardest workout program ever put on DVD. “P90X” is another popular and intense workout used by several of my YP friends, but it costs about $200, you have to buy additional equipment, and, well, I don’t want to wait 90 days.

INSANITY is a 60-day “total body conditioning program” created by personal trainer Shaun T. He promises to push me past my limits with 10 discs of plyometric drills on top of nonstop intervals of strength, power, resistance and ab and core training moves. No equipment or weights are needed, which is great because I’ve had a gym membership for six months that was used infrequently, to say the least.

Joining me on this two-month journey is my boyfriend, a 22 year-old-college student who looks great to me but says his goal is mainly to have more energy overall.

“I want to be able to carry all the groceries at once – little things like that,” he said.

INSANITY comes with a free “elite nutrition plan” that Martell and I have both deemed impossible. Shaun T wants you to spread something like 1,400 calories over five meals a day, and says your body doesn’t need carbonated beverages or artificial sweeteners. If that’s what Shaun does, take a look at him, ladies – it’s obviously working – but me and my coffee shall never part. But I will make small dietary modifications, like drinking more water, cutting back on sugary snacks and adding more fresh fruit and veggies to my meals.

I’m excited and plan to share updates throughout my journey. Feel free to share your thoughts and especially your encouragement or questions. The fun begins today, Monday, Jan. 3.

(Does this sound like an article? Cuz it is, lol)

Best Song of 2010

2010 was a year of mediocre music. Yeah, I said it.  There were a couple pretty good songs, but not too many great ones.
With that in mind, my vote for the best song was a pretty easy decision. It goes to Miguel aka Miguel Jontel, feat J. Cole with "All I Want is You."
A soulful song with great lyrics, a couple clever rap verses, and a real groovy beat. The music was simple really, just a sparse guitar loop over a little snare that repeats and repeats - didn't build or do anything too exciting, but it has yet to get old, and I'm still tapping my toes.

Merry Christmas to Me!

Can you see that? That is Miss Hello Kitty - perfume! Sephora had a two-day preview of its new cosmetics line at the end of December, which included blush, lip glosses, lotion, mirrors and other STUPID-cute items.

The full line will debut in stores mid-January, and I knew this would happen, but I waited until I got off work to try to buy stuff and it was all sold out, except for this perfume. It smelled exactly like I thought it would - and no, I can't describe it, but it's unique, clean, elegant...*sigh* just plain amazing! And it even came with the old school puff thing that you squeeze to dispense the perfume! (idk what you call it guys, I'm sorry)

I hate that everyone will be able to purchase it and smell like me pretty soon, but I DEFINITELY plan to re-up and to buy the lotion, shower gel, compact mirror, and heck why not - even try some blush!

Chunkin up the Deuces

So I wanna try to talk about this in very general terms. Hoping that once I write it all out, I'll get over it.

Someone told me today that someone I pretty much grew up with had a problem with me because I "said some things." Now, this person and I haven't been close for a while, but we've hung out a couple times when I was home from school and had a great time. In the meantime, we hadn't spoken, so I was confused about these "things" I'd allegedly said.

No need to do the third party thing, I sent her a direct message like I heard you a problem with me, but you don't talk to me and I don't talk to you, so what are you referring to?

This chick says, you're right, we don't talk and we can keep it like that, don't message me I'm done.

WOW! REALLY? (and this is someone's mother, mind you. smh.)

So I'm like, alright then, be mad for no reason, cool.

I guess she missed the point. If I didn't want a resolution, I wouldn't have made that move. Obviously she didn't see anything worth salvaging. OH Yeah - did I  mention this person is a "family" member? I guess we gon die without saying another word to each other.

For shame!

I don't need to be rich

Just rich enuf to not have to ask anyone for anything. 

Listening to a friend who has spent most of the year trying to get adequate care for a broken foot only to be ushered out of the hospital as soon as doctors find out she has no insurance made me so disgusted that I thought, I need to be so rich that I don't even need insurance! I want to be able to fund my own hospital stay, emergency care, whatever.

This theory extends far beyond healthcare though. I heard horror stories from a toy giveaway at a church (of all places!) where people said they were locked in a room and had to wait hours for a couple toys, after having to attend a mandatory church service and being talked to very disrespectfully. You never hear of such injustices being done to people who aren't at the mercy of others...a good reason to be rich - as if you needed another one.

Gettin Over

Dear Mr. Time Warner,

I do NOT appreciate how you snuck an extra $5 to my "low introductory new customer special" price for wireless Internet service. Sure, it's only five dollars. But that certainly makes your ads promising high-speed Internet for less than $30 a month ineffectual, doesn't it?

And what's to keep you from tacking on five more dollars next month? Hmmmph.

Signed,

Please Stop

I Hate Breakfast

But  I miss Chik-fil-A. There's something about a chkn biscuit (which McD's woefully attempted) that just feels so right in the morning next to some tater tots and sweet tea.

I really should just open a franchise and bring delicious breakfast chickens to the East Coast. Yea, they make other stuff too, but lunch isn't the problem here.

Quick morning-food options are limited, though I'm a firm believer that "breakfast" consists of anything I decide to eat in the morning, which is never going to be eggs, waffles or sausage. I'm over omnipresent Tim Hortons, greasy McD's and bland Dunkin Donuts. 

How lovely it would be to leave my apartment with 30 minutes to spare and be able to grab a chkn biscuit on the way downtown?! *Sigh*

Where's the instruction manual?

Man, I'm starting to feel (even more) bad for all you McDonald's employees. Mickey D's is just doing way too much these days. You gotta make McRibs, cookies, angus snack wraps, frappucinos AND oatmeal now? Gee whiz!
And when did oatmeal become the new thing for fast food? I've seen it dressed up and snooty-fied at Starbucks with all kindsa berried and whatnots...but it's trickled down to McDonald's now? That means it's big!

The Sound of Christmas

Who decided "These are a Few of my Favorite Things" was a Christmas song? I don't recall it being a holiday in "The Sound of Music" when Julie Andrews sang it.

I can see how people could interpret it to fit the holiday spirit, but it's a stretch. There's no mention of Santa, Jesus, Christmas trees, presents, etc. But OK, it's still a great and timeless song.

I'm NOT Surprised

Well, I kinda am or else I wouldn't take the time to write about it, but apparently Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johanssen are divorcing.

The marriage was pretty low key - They married in 2008, but I only JUST heard about it with her being on the cover of In Style mag a couple months ago, and him on this TV special for People's Sexiest Men of the Year a couple of weeks ago talking about her - but they've been separated six months?!

After seeing "The Proposal" I finally jumped on the Ryan Reynolds-is-HOTT bandwagon, so I'm not too crushed by this news. Howev, after learning that he was engaged to Alanis Morisette before, idk where his taste lies, cuz that's a weird one right there.

Pride

I am NOT a racist.
Not a black nationalist.

i can see how you might think I am.

i just believe black people are


Beautiful
   Powerful
Royal
And undervalued - by ourselves and everyone else

Men, Tyler Perry does NOT hate you

I'd venture to say that of all the movies Tyler Perry has, more of them feature bitchy and raggedy women than negative portrayals of black men.
With For Colored Girls, you all keep saying TP "keeps making black men look bad." Y'all do that yourselves. But I digress.
I truly believe he does the opposite. He tries hard to show us that there are good black men out there, and he actually portrays the WOMEN doing them wrong. In many of the movies, the man is going way above and beyond to convince a broken woman to let go of her past and give him a chance. These men are long-suffering, patient and very eloquent in expressing their feelings.

Are there exceptions? Sure. Blair Underwood's character in "Family Reunion" was a wife beater and ol boy in "Diary of a Mad Black Woman" did cheat and drag Kimberly Elise out the house.  

But:

• Shemar Moore's character in "Diary" was a good man who let Kimberly Elise slap him, talk to him like trash, go take care of her ex AND come back, and his i love u speech was A-mazing!
• Boris Kodjoe's character in "Family Reunion" was a hard-working, blue collar single parent who loved his kids and was patient with the chick who's name i dont know
• In "Why Did I Get Married" parts 1 and 2, Tyler Perry's wife ignored him, tied her tubes without talking to him, didnt want to give the man any kids or nookie, and then damn-near cheated with her coworker. And yet, he begged her to come back
• "Daddy's Little Girls" was ALL about a hard-working man fighting for custody of his kids versus his sleazy, ignorant ex-wife
• In "The Family that Preys" - come on, where do we start? Sanaa Lathan DOGGED her husband, cheated on him, called him sorry, controlled all the money, left him, etc
• Was Taraji's character in "I Can Do Bad" not a bitter, hateful, self-loathing, adulteress slut?
• And Janet pretty much killed Gavin.

The list goes on and on.
So in conclusion, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, Tyler Perry does not hate men. He uses them as secondary characters that revolve around, sometimes antagonize and often save the female leads and/or lead them to self awareness.

The defense rests.

Coonin for Company

My bf is making music with his coworker right now. Meanwhile, my (obvious) wig just came in the mail and I'm anxious to slap it on.

Coworker dates a white girl...which is why I'm thinking twice about walking back out into the living room with a completely different texture and length of hair. He's probly thinking, "I'm glad I don't have to deal with that...."

*Kanye shrug*

It's About Time...

Decided I was beautiful today.

I don't know if it's cuz I looked in the mirror and saw my grandmother's eyes; or if it's cuz my hair is back the color God made it;  or what. But I was pleased with me today.
Struggling with self-image is universal to all women, I suppose, but I'd venture to say two or three times as bad for black women.

So here's to hoping this feeling will make it to tomorrow....

This is Why we Pirate

I'm done buying CDs.

In a noble effort of support,  I do actually still go out and purchase the CDs of artists I care enough about. (That is a select group, I will admit.)

But after continuing to be disappointed, I've decided I'll just stick with the radio. Why should I give you my money when what I get in return isn't deserving of my investment?

"Album sales are down, the industry is on life support!" That's the cry we've heard from those bemoaning the current state of the music industry. Perhaps if between the labels and the artists, you all truly put together a compilation of the best material, people would be more inclined to buy it.

Hearing creative, imaginative singles, features and mixtape work is what whets our appetite for an artist's full-length work. But Miguel, Robin Thicke, Trey, (etc) when I get these bland, lifeless albums it's a letdown and a turnoff. What gets lost between the music that makes us fall in love and the music that makes it to the CD?

Case in point, after like 2 years of listening to individual songs, I've been dying to buy Miguel's CD - whenever he got around to making one. Finally got it Wednesday. Where's the intriguing themes, the unexpected sounds, the compelling rhythms that made me want to move on "Dig," "Ooh Ah" and "Overlaod"? Where was the passion I heard in "Supernatural"? The undeniable groove of that funky loop in the first single, "All I Want is You"? Unfortunately, the only songs I like on this dreary album are the ones I've already heard.

And then the music bloggers and writers mislead us, heralding an album as an artist's best work,(i.e. Kanye) when it's really mediocre. Yall need to stop kissin up and lying to the ppl! I actually can't tell you the last good CD I bought - good in terms of having to skip very few tracks and being able to listen to it again and again. Maybe Wale's "Attention Deficit." Maybe Drake "Thank Me Later," which even had to grow on me.

I want to be grabbed, wowed and captivated til the end. When did music stop having high expectations for itself? I don't care if you're tired from touring, tweeting and trying to be everywhere at once. Stop stretching yourself so thin that you deliver a half-cooked product.  And if the label won't let you? YOU'RE the artist, YOU'RE the commodity. Don't let them take away your voice! Assert yourself and give the fans what you know you're capable of and what we tell you we want. This thang should be a lil more democratic than it is. Cuz right now I feel like I'm being force fed major bull sh*t. I mean, seriously, half the songs on these albums nowadays, I'm like, did YOU even like that when you recorded it? Doesn't sound like it. You couldn't have been nodding your head like that sounded good, cuz u know it doesn't!

*Sigh* Monica let me down this year, Rick Ross underwhelmed me, Mike Posner was just a little better than OK, previewed "Pink Friday," and as much as I thought I wanted it, listening in advance was a good idea that saved me a few coins. Jazmine Sullivan, your second single is a yawn, and Miss Chrisette, what IS this woeful, messy single you've dropped an album off of?


This is coming from a place of love. I like you guys. I want you to be good. I want to be an active supporter. But I'm feeling more like a scorned ex. "Yall almost walked off wid alla my stuff"!

Take it Back!

You'll be so surprised to learn what you can do if you just determine that you will try and get it right. Often it takes an external disappointment or anger to spur you to action.
For example, I went to the salon Saturday. I call myself going to a professional for help, since I (thought) I didn't know what to do with my hair. The stylist says, "The only thing you can do when your hair is this length is put weave in it."
I shoulda left right then. So she's like, "We'll figure something out. I can curl the front, but I just don't know what to do with the back of your hair." So at this point, it's like, I appreciate your honesty, but wth you mean?  Clearly, I'd come to the wrong place.
So she came up with some whack, crunchy, spritzed-up situation. And yesterday I was so disgusted with it that I decided to fix it myself.
If you know me, you know my hair has been blonde, orange, yellow and bronze this year! So not only did I dye it back to black, but I curled it to perfection - hooked up the pin-curl look I've been trying to get the stylists to do, but they never seemed to get it. I can't tell you the last time I was so proud of myself. (I'm lying - Yes I can, last week when I made collard greens for the first time. After burning the first batch I came back with a vengeance and got it right!)
See, all you gotta do is put your mind to it!

Cliffhanger

In all my years of going to church, yesterday was a first:

The pastor was giving this passionate sermon about the children of Israel wandering in the wilderness, and he was getting to the parts where they started "murmuring and complaining" and saying they should just go back to Egypt.

 So he's like, "WHY would anyone want to turn back to bondage after tasting sweet freedom? I get so tired of people getting saved and I feed them and change their diaper spiritually and put it in so much work to help them grow and then they just turn back to where they came from. WHY oh WHY would anyone want to go back into sin?" etc etc

And he's jumping up and down and really just putting his all into it, and I'm like why why why? tell me?


And this man says, "I'll tell you why next week."

WHAAT?!!!! Pastor, what is this soap opera sermon u just preached?
If I hadn't enjoyed everything before then I would have been mad, especially since I know I have to work next week and won't be able to get the answer. It felt like watching a rerun of Fresh Prince where they played part 1 but didn't play part 2 right after it.

Deva's Christmas list

In case you're wondering, here's what I'd like:

Coffee maker (Keurig would be nice, but I'm not picky)

Red pumps

2 packs of Bohyme french refined hair 1B

queen sized blanket

silver necklace

new windshield wiper blades

a warm jacket (in btw a heavy sweater and thick winter coat)

The Princess and the Frog DVD

an iPod

rain boots

a bubble umbrella

CDs by Miguel, Ladyhawke, Lily Allen, Adele, Phoenix, The Bird and the Bee and Regina Spektor



Just in case you had an especially prosperous year....

Mo-Mama!

Ay, her hair looks like Robin Thicke's but it is tooo cute!

Glasses

Hey all you girls who wear glasses:

Do you try to wear makeup at the same time? I really don't think people can see it when we wear eyeshadow and whatnot under our glasses.

Maybe I should address that question to the ppl who look at us all day.

For Colored Girls

For the record, it wasn't as bad as it could have been - we've seen far worse from Tyler Perry.

But that's not my point. My sis just saw it and sent me thee craziest text message:

"The only good parts were the kids dying and the rape."

No, m'am, it must be Opposite Day. Those were actually the WORST parts. In addition to the Macy Gray cameo with Macy playing herself.

And then, becuz many atime we text faster than we think, she wrote:

"Oh yea I like when she slapped the dead racist."

(P.S. I think the young sister Nyla looks like Angela Simmons and Janet looked like Minnie Mouse)

Men

I just had to share this. My bf and I had a fight recently where he decided he needed to talk about my weave. Here's a direct quote:

"You just look like a better person without it."

- Really? a better person??

Then later he looks at this (horrid) pic of Lauryn Hill with a (pretty) curly natural 'fro and says:

"See how clean you could look?"

smh. I had no words.

Is it Just Me?

Does anyone else think the Time Warner Cable logo looks a little like The Eye of Horus?

DevaDonna.blogspot.com